my my my



i was talking to a friend about benny and joon, the movie. i have never seen it, but i know two very important aspects now. johnny depp is in the movie, and he has a cane.

those two bits of information i had not known prior to my friend telling me that he has the cane. he has the actual cane that mr depp used during the filming of benny and joon.

that’s just cool, movie props are great. i know thousands of geeks that would love to get their hands on the light sabre that luke used during the empire strikes back, ok even i’d like to have that.

as soon as he told me that he has the cane, i thought about what movie prop i would just love to have. the answer popped out in my head like a cartoon lightbulb appears in the comics.

i want willy wonka’s hat.

i wouldn’t wear the hat that gene wilder immortalized, well maybe around the house for a few days. i would just like to have that hat. willy wonka and his chocolate factory can be wrapped up in that weird fuzzy chocolate flavored hat.

maybe i thought about this because in the beginning of the movie, willy wonka walks with a cane –that’s my second most wanted prop, so i could have a cane duel with my friend.

don't worry be happy

happiness comes in spurts. regardless of who you are, everyone gets the same amount. rich people, poor people, single people and happily married with 2.5 kids and a dog people… each and every one of them get just as many happiness feelings each day.

happiness is an instantaneous feeling. happiness shows up, lifts your spirits, and then leaves you as quickly as it came. happiness doesn’t occur over an extended period of time.

now, being content is a different story.

i see struggle everywhere, struggle and dis-content. at the grocery store i notice a clerk’s defeated eyes continuing a life of struggle. as i hand three dollars to the booth attendant i see struggle and dis-content in his face. sitting on a packed bus i observe and see very few people content with their lives. i am not mistaken those who just experienced one of their ‘happy moments’ for content people. the difference is subtle yet apparent.

i have discovered my quest: contentness, the absence of struggle.

its not easy. so tough that its too hard for most people to find, instead they band-aid their misery with something that half fills the void, those jolts of happiness. it’s enough to get by.

i'm not everybody, i'm that minority breed of human being who sees the attainable and pursues it until i die or succeed. repeat, it’s not easy, but nothing of worth is.

look down, move foreword, and keep the end result focused in your sights.

i've been searching for the content/struggle-free feeling all along, i just didn’t realize what set me apart from the rest.

what exactly do i mean when i say ‘feel content with my life’? my life is not all about one thing, or one person, or one place. it’s a package deal, one item does not give the contentness that i yearn for. i also need the job of my dreams, the home of my dreams, the kids of my dreams… the life of my dreams. life is made up of multiple entities, i strive to attain all of the ones i admire.

all of these aspects shall be poured together, add some ice, shake, and filter for the perfect mix. let’s call this drink, content. goal achieved.

I've been neglecting my blog, and she hates me for it. Nobody visits anymore, nobody comments either, and it's all my fault.

Someday I'll redeem myself to /hunger, but as of now I'm closer to being a deadbeat dad than anything. In hopes to revive my site I decided to post a pic of someone that I haven't seen in far too long. I feel that others haven't seen her either so here she is, the sight for sore eyes. nancy =)

girls are catching up

my roommate told me in a casual conversation “girls are catching up”, it stuck in my mind.

girls are catching up to what? what did she mean? and it hit me like a ton of bricks, dropped off the empire state building, and landing on a bike with no seat. ah ha! *points to the sky* girls are catching up.

with a little bit of time and space bending and we find ourselves back to the 50’s. women wearing plaid dresses, men working in suits, every family has a single income, the leave it to beaver-type household. a man is a man, he works and his wife cooks, cleans, and raises the children. women need to learn the household duties, and look pretty. men have to make the money, put that food on the table.

a man able to provide, and a pretty woman who can cook is the 1950’s formula for happiness.

women aren’t there anymore, women are men now. women make more money than men, women are ceo’s, managers, directors, women are your boss. a woman does not need to search for her provider anymore, she is it. women are independent today, they can pay for themselves, and in some cases, others.

women haven’t dropped the expectations conjured up in the 50’s. a woman actually thinks if herself as a degenerate if she cannot cook gourmet cuisine. this is not uncommon, yet that the same woman manages a group of 10 in a high tech consulting firm.

women wear uncomfortable shoes and revealing clothes, along with makeup (which is not cheap). men keep with their simple suits and jackets. these independent women aren’t in search for a provider, they are searching for a trophy. the former trophy is now a trophy hunter.

metrosexuals, and queer eye for the straight guy are huge because of this. women can afford to be picky when choosing a man. boys, we have to take a bit better care of appearance if we want one of these new breeds of women. i see it starting with men ‘caring’ more about their styles and appearance. am i forecasting that men will be wearing makeup in the near future? who knows, but in 20 years if mac for men is the hottest thing don’t say i didn’t call it.

after realizing this i think i’ll start cutting my hair every 2 months instead of every 4.

i’m just everybody


everyone on myspace.com or friendster.com has a dj profile pic. if they’re not a dj then they are a lead singer or a guitarist. being involved in music gets the girls.

speaking about the girls, if i was a girl i’d have a studio pic or 12 of me for my myspace/ friendster/ orkut/ iprocrastinate/ etc profile pic.

while mixing i usually look at my reflection in the record and think, this would be a cool picture. so the other day i went and captured the moment. i must say i haven’t seen this done before although i’m sure it has been.

i feel like it’s 1998 and i just got a pair of those nike air jordan’s that everyone had 4 years before me. i’m late but i’m comin up.

roomates and 26 years

one sentence, perfect timing, perfect tone, makes living with roommmates that more enjoyable.

"damn, french laundry and shit" -ka'le

my onions-mushrooms-hotdogs with pepper over rice.

i'm turning 26 tomorrow. tonight's agenda:
"celebrating" with a few friends at the element lounge. my bday wish is to flash back one year ago, and do my #25 birthday party all over.

let's reminisce:

-beautiful san diego weather
-persian food feast with my family and friends,
-hundred dollar bottle of scotch,
-live musical performers
-drunk parents
-bar hopping in gaslamp ($400.00 worth)
-friends travelled hours for the event
-and to top it off, the night prior was spent in la hopping venues with a different handfull of friends.

this year is different, a few corny cards in the mail compliments of the most important girls in my life have kept me in high spirits.

twenty six is here and i'm ready for it. i'll be eating/cooking french laundry style more often now that i'm approaching my late twenties.

26 times

i was asked "how old are you" yesterday. i answered "26". twenty six was a farce, i'm still 25... for 4 more days.


i want my birthday to pass undetected this year. better yet, post pone my bday for 6 months or so. i feel that celebrating after all of my time-wasting and procrastination just won't taste as sweet.

i also saw a man holding a cardboard sign that said "today is my 30th birthday and i'm homeless. please help." i didn't help him because at the rate i'm going... i will be him in 4 years.

there's only one thing to do in a situation like this: take a self portrait!!

the great vodka experiment: (click on picture)

SPAM is the fruit of the GODS!
The fruit of the GODS I say! You’re not listening to me. yes SPAM, the fruit of the GODS.

Give me 3 things and I’m happy forever. SPAM, rice, and cock sauce (aka sriracha hot chili sauce)



Life’s simple pleasures can be great ones for those of you who are willing to open your mouths and close your eyes. My roommates are both out of the house, it’s 1:00pm and I’m rocking out to some newly downloaded chicken lips tracks. Living life as a god isn’t for everyone, that’s right… the fruit of the gods!

regret

i’ve seen geraldo’s talk show once or twice. he has these people on the show who were once skinny nerds that people picked on in high school. they are tell a sad sap story about being teased and how they used those moments for bodybuilding motivation. in a shocking surprise, the bully of our skinny nerd, shows up and is called out onto stage. what happens then? the bully says that they don’t remember this person… they picked on tons of kids and did plenty of harmful things to all the nerds. the bullies forget, the nerds don’t.

i was neither bully nor nerd in high school, i was a crack-slipper-thru-er. my coolness status was a notch below “able to spend lunch with us”, in reference to the “popular” crowd that is. i’d catch some high fives, or “hey what’s, up guy” from the popular kids around campus, but no partying with them on the weekends or even study sessions.

i am reminded of one particular class, my homeroom in 8th grade, i was 13 years old. 12 years ago to this day i can recall the seat i sat in, who sat in front of and beside me. to my left was a popular skateboard druggie punk rock kid. directly in front of me was a short quiet band playing ap student.

teased is an understatement. the boy to my left was known by everyone in the class, and girls liked him. i wanted to be cool with him so i could share in his infinite wealth of popularity. he didn’t pay attention in class, that isn’t something that “cool” kids did/do. instead he chose to jab his pen into the back of the short quiet boy who sat in front of me. i participated in the poking of our small shy boy with my pen. i had a handful of classes before with the poked boy, i knew him and he knew me.

i remember one day i poked him rather hard, leaving pen marks on his clothing wasn’t abnormal. simultaneously the popular kid to my left gave the boy a super huge weggie (grab the underpants and pull up). when i say super i mean the elastic portion of the tighty whiteys had come apart and were now hooked over his shoulder. i laughed.

eventually yearbooks were distributed and that class had come to an end. i handed my yearbook to the boy i teased and asked him to sign my year book.

i realized not that i had been a complete polar opposite of myself. i have no proof but i’m very sure that the boy went home and cried on more than one occasion. what power took over me to want to torment someone who i knew and had nothing against. why did i do such a thing? i bullied the kid, and i remember everything…

he wrote in my yearbook, “probably would have been nicer in another class”.