the oldest is the youngest

there's a concept that i've known most of my life, but just recently have become aware of. the oldest child in a family, is normally the youngest child among their friends. however simple and frankly incorrect my hypothesis may sound upon the first read, there's more to it than a comparison of years.

children who are the oldest in their family (physical years), are the pioneers of the children in their family. father and mother are too old to be "cool" so the child has to find cool on their own, which is usually tv, friends, school, etc. these children are normally a bit less mature and hip than others their age who have older siblings.

on a daily basis the oldest child spends time with their younger, immature siblings. they may be accustom to watching nickelodeon after school because that's what little sister wants to see. whereas the children who have older siblings come home to mtv reality shows about million dollar birthday parties and the next cool bands. in a sense, the oldest lives much 'younger' than their peers who have guidance from older brothers and sisters.

i remember the first time i heard a friend of mine use the word "sick", in a way that meant something good (like the word 'bad' in the 80's). i came over to his house on a summer day, to hang out and listen to music. we were 14 or 15 years old, and rap music bonded us. i had just purchased a new cd, and he had a few new ones for me to listen to. his older brother had given him a hackey sack, and he showed it to me while we were jammin' some urban anger in the suburban comfort. he said to me "look at what my brother gave me, isn't that sick. it's a sick hackey sack isn't it?"

i paused for what felt like 15 seconds but must have been just one or two. "yea, that's pretty (pause) sick." minutes later i heard his older brother down the hall on the phone, talking about how something was "sick", the good sick.

i'm the oldest of three. and even today i feel the young-ness of being the oldest. there are things that others are aware of, awaiting, shooting for that i'm slowly discovering exist. i feel like the younger one, the more inexperienced, even though i'm the oldest child.