insomnia



today i've got mad insomnia. tonight for that matter. i'm very awake, it's very hot in my room. i miss being on vacation, i could always sleep then. i could do a million positive things like finish unpacking, mix records, write, read, organize my life's tribulations, read friend's blogs, write down good things about each of my friends and family members.

instead i post to this web page in hopes that james will comment on my thoughts and experiences multiple times with the same response.



i realized that i've come a long way, one friend asked me about my theory of girls with their hair up. and so i reverted back to the entry a few months ago addressing the issue. and my writing was so poor, ideas were so scattered and more difficult to comprehend than the reason people buy country music.



i stare at my buddy list and wish for one of those dim names to become bold once again. even though there are names in bold, i just don't feel like that same old conversation with those same old people, leading to that same old suddend end in chatting because both parties have completely lost intrest in the subject matter.



i somehow miss japan (and emi). or maybe i miss the idea of not being here where i'm so comfortable that i become extremely lazy and unmotivated.change is needed. change means living. no change means death. a quick drink and a cig may be exactly what i need to kick start my thursday night slumber...

or maybe cleaning my room would be more beneficial in the long run.

hmph. either way i'm not doing so well am i?