what have i done



i've lost my will to blog.

i've let so many days go by without posting my unimportant thoughts up here that i'm surprised they haven't erased my nonesense from the server!



oh well.. time to redeem myself... or at least update



so there's still a fish dead in my tank, just floating. it's starting to smell up my bedroom and i'm not sure how much longer i can handle it. maybe i should get the fish out of there and take the water out as well?



it's hard to deal with death. it's like getting a very short haircut. you're shocked everytime you look in the mirror because you're so used to seeing yourself with long hair. you even feel different but it's not always 100% apparent why. it takes time to settle and get used to what's going on before life can remain the same ( i just shaved my roomate's head and i'm still getting used to what he looks like with a no.4 guard buzz cut) but this isn't about him it's about my dead smelly fish.



so life in ameer world is not too bad. besides having the longest day of my life yesterday things are good and i'm not sure why/how... but you can't question things like that or else i may just not find anything and realize that i've been feeling a false goodness... and that'd almost devistate me.



so before i disect what it is that i'm feeling good about i'm going to leave this and not worry about the cause.